Ramblings of a Transgender Christian

I rarely find a song that I find myself constantly going back to, but this is one of them. MGK's honestness in this song is amazing and boy, can I relate to it. "There's something fucking wrong with me", yep, I hear you MGK. "I guess it's just my life and I can take it if I wanna", feeling that right now myself. "You'll find me alone at midnight inside my mind, tryna get things right." Literally last night for me.

See, we've all got somethin' that we trapped inside That we try to suffocate, you know, hopin' it dies Try to hold it underwater but it always survives Then it comes up out of nowhere like an evil surprise For me, that "something" is gender dysphoria. I tried for years to deny that I was transgender. I did everything to convince myself that I wasn't, because I was scared (if you are or grew up in a Christian conservative home with dysphoria you understand). Then, a few months ago it became uncontrollable and became so overwhelming that I had to start coming out to people and decide to transition (haven't started transitioning yet, but will). All because I spent those few years suppressing it so much.

As an LGBT Christian, the song "What Matters More" by Derek Webb really helped me a lot. It made me realize not every Christian is judgemental and hateful towards the LGBT community and was willing to call out other straight Christians out on how overly focused they are on putting us back in the closet. Anyway, just wanted to share this song that helped change my views on my spiritual family.