Ramblings of a Transgender Christian

Hey guys, sorry for posting this so late, but I'm moving the blog over to a new site, eventually the website's domain will change to this one, once I have the money, but for now, here is the new URL: https://transramblings.weebly.com/

To those I know in real life and online, I want to apologize. I want to apologize for how self-absorbed I am. I want to apologize for how attention seeking I am. I want to apologize for how depressing I am. I want to apologize for how I burden you with my problems. I want to apologize for how I push you all away, either by being too clingy or by being generally unpleasant or by straight-out ignoring you. I know I am an unpleasant person to be around, I am about as far removed from being a person you want to hang-out with as you can get. I am sorry. I want you all to know, I am trying. I know it often, ok, probably all the time, looks like I'm not, and I'm just oblivious to my behavior. Honestly, there are some things I am probably oblivious to, and even more than that, I admit, often times, while I'm in the act of doing so, I am oblivious to how my actions and words come across. Other times, I do know how they're coming across, but I cannot stop myself, due to how ing

What is it that every therapist, and then every single person because of them telling people that they should open up to others, stop doing things on their own, you know, get help, especially if you're mentally ill. Well, this past year, I have been doing that. And do you know what I've learned? It's not worth it. All it does is create more problems and bring you down even more. I've opened up my soul, my heart to others. I've let others know what it is I've been through and am going through. I've texted people when feeling suicidal. All that's happened is me feeling even worse and more horrible at the end of it all. All I've learned is that it's not worth it. My mental health has only gotten worse when sharing my burdens with others. So, what I'm saying is, I'm done doing that. This blog will be my sole outlet for my burdens, as people are incapable of helping me at all. I've already cut my mental ties loose with everyone I used to s